Monday, March 8, 2010

Good at Stealth, Bad at Hygiene

I've been watching too many cryptozoology shows on Discovery Channel.

Yesterday, it warmed up to 0 and there was no wind so I thought I would walk to the store. I didn't even need snowpants, but I should probably have remembered gloves. Oh well. I cut behind the senior center and since that was near where I saw the polar bear that one time, I became more cautious. Nothing ruins a nice stroll for some corn chips like ending up a red smear on the snow. Snowpants or not, I can't outrun one of those things.

So I'm in alert mode, and maybe my senses heightened a little too much because all of a sudden, I'm just about to gag from the stink. Just a terrible, oily, greasy, rancid, sickly sweet, rotten meat funk.

And the first dorky thought to go through my mind? It was: Isn't Bigfoot supposed to stink?

Like there was a Bigfoot hanging out behind the old folks' home. Maybe to meet women. I don't know. Then I realized that there were two skin boats being stretched back there and it was the skins I was smelling. (They stretch and bleach and other things for whaling season.) My second thought was a little more relevant. Would that reek draw in polar bears? I got out of there. I couldn't breathe and bears rate pretty high on my threat levels.

And Bigfoot is tricksy:
Photobucket

Heehee! I like his expression in the bottom one. I've made that face a few times. I don't remember if I had a bat.

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